Mr Rosa's elderly aunt, who has recently gone into a Nursing Home, has gone downhill, physically, very quickly, although she's still mentally very alert. We have been told, in confidence, that the reason she's ailing is that she has a very aggressive form of leukaemia, and is probably not long for this world. She is very tired and, as she has no immunity, is unable to fight infections. She has asked that only we are told about this; she doesn't want anyone else to know. She's been offered blood transfusions to give her a temporary 'boost', but has refused. She's way past treatment, and is receiving palliative care only.
We've recently had calls from close friends of hers who say that they've visited her, and were shocked at how quickly she'd deteriorated. They were berating the staff at the Nursing Home, and saying that they thought Mr R should be looking at finding a new one. Her recent, rapid, deterioration is because of her illness, not the care she's receiving, but we're unable to tell them that. We don't have any concerns about the Nursing Home at all, and we know she is settled there.
It's difficult...we don't want them upsetting the Staff at the home, or causing ructions, but we also feel duty bound to respect Mr R's aunt's wishes and keep her illness secret.
Should we tell her friends the truth, but break the Aunt's confidence? Or should we just say that if they have any concerns they should just speak to the Nursing Home Matron, and let her decide what's best.
What would you do?
In a Quandary
We've recently had calls from close friends of hers who say that they've visited her, and were shocked at how quickly she'd deteriorated. They were berating the staff at the Nursing Home, and saying that they thought Mr R should be looking at finding a new one. Her recent, rapid, deterioration is because of her illness, not the care she's receiving, but we're unable to tell them that. We don't have any concerns about the Nursing Home at all, and we know she is settled there.
It's difficult...we don't want them upsetting the Staff at the home, or causing ructions, but we also feel duty bound to respect Mr R's aunt's wishes and keep her illness secret.
Should we tell her friends the truth, but break the Aunt's confidence? Or should we just say that if they have any concerns they should just speak to the Nursing Home Matron, and let her decide what's best.
What would you do?
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